Lost

Since I graduated last week I have felt lost (for lack of a better word). All I've known since kindergarten is school. School has been my life for a long time, and now it's over. I feel sad too that all my friends are moving on to their bachelor's degrees, even the ones with babies. It makes me sad to think I am not going on too, but I really have never wanted a bachelors in nursing, so why do it? I feel as though I have no direction to go in my life. I feel like I need something new to move towards, because right now I'm going nowhere. My next goals right now are to pass my NCLEX and get a job, but those will hopefully be done soon too. Anyone have any insight?

Spencer is 11 Months!

Yep, that's right, only one more month til he's 1! We love our little guy so much and can't believe it's been almost a year! I feel so bad that he's had a bit of a distracted mom the last 2 semesters while I finish school, but I'm glad I did and someday he will be too. Here are some fun things about Spencer:

• Loves to try to sing along with you or the music (though it's mostly just shrieking or screaming)
• Is a major daddy's boy
• Can walk with his toy walker thing
• Crawls everywhere and gets into whatever he can
• Loves to pull all the DVDs and Wii games off the shelf
• Has 3 teeth: 2 crooked bottom and 1 top one
• Will eat anything I feed him
• LOVES his bath and will try to turn on the water when I empty the tub at the end
• Will put anything in his mouth so we have to watch him!
• Hardly ever cries, even when he got majorly scratched by Leo (we didn't even know it had happened til we noticed blood on his arm)
• Can say mama, dada, baba, and nana (Jacob's mom)

(Sorry for no pictures. We got a portable hard drive and moved all our pictures over to that. However, 5 days later it went all weird and we lost everything on it :'( )

Finished!

Last night I took my last final to finish the nursing program! I am so excited to be done! Now I just have to find things to do with my little guy, especially while it's still bad weather!

You know you're in nursing school if...

• You dream about drug names
• You don't have time to eat, sleep, or pee, but you have time to care about the homeless population (Jessica Kemp)
• You know many different ways to kill people
• Games of "Would You Rather" include things like sucking on the yaunker of a pneumonia patient
• You laugh at jokes most people wouldn't understand
• One of your textbooks weighs more than your 6 month old
• You can handle blood, guts, pee, poop, vomit, and mucus, but your brother's toe jam grosses you out
• You can't wait to be done but are terrified to be out in the "real world"

You know you're a mom if...

• You find yourself singing along with the music from your child's toys
• Your day consists of schedules of eating, sleeping, peeing, pooping, playing... and if that schedule is disturbed, all Hell breaks loose
• You vow that someday you will return the favor to your currently childless relative who gave your child the insanely annoying singing toy
• You run out of space to store the hugely bulky baby items that your child required only for a short time
• You can't wait for your child to crawl or take those first steps, but once they do, you wish they hadn't
• You spend 9 months carrying him, woke up at night to feed and comfort him, and were responsible for the majority of his nurturing and care and his first word is Dada
• Your anniversary dinner was at Carl's Jr.
• You find a pacifier in your backpack
• You use LOTS of spray and wash
• You can go from being extremely frustrated to so in love in an instant

Discourgaged...

Right now I'm finding myself more and more discouraged with the RN job situation. A lot of the jobs out there are full time and full time is not something I want to be doing. All I've ever wanted to do with my life is work with the moms and babies, and right now that is not possible. I don't want to work with stinky old people, I hate it. I've never really felt like my faith has been tested during my life much, but right now I think it is. I feel like I am just going to need to hold out and have faith that because I have a family and finished school that eventually something will come up. And to be honest, if I wouldn't have had Spencer last summer, it would have been this summer, so I'd still be in the same situation. And really, I need something to do once a week to use my license that I've worked so hard to earn and to get out of the house! Right now I'm really feeling like my work on my floor for 2.5 years has been for nothing and that my schooling has just been a waste of time.

Here is a cute picture of my boys!

In my spring cleaning, I have realized we have a lot of big baby stuff that I have no place to put. Things like a swing, baby bathtub, jumper/bouncer, etc. These are all things he doesn't use anymore and they are big and bulky and I do not know where to store them. Ahh!!! Right now they are all stuffed in our guest room, but that can't be a permanent place for them. Oh the joys of children!

Yoga & Organizing

Last night, my friend and I went to our first yoga class. We LOVED it!!! We want to go back every week if possible. Only problem is, Jacob has church meetings and will not take Spencer :( So I'm going to have to find a sitter for him...drat.
Yoga is seriously awesome though. I felt so much better afterward and it was nice to get some time with my friend and for myself.

On another note, spring cleaning fever has hit! I have a book called "The Organized Mom" and I love to read it over and over. I know, I'm a total dork. But, I love to organize anything and everything!

Yoga

I went to a yoga class as part of my online stress management and I loved it! It's a lot harder than it looks but is really fun. I want to try to find a cheap (or free) class around here and a buddy or two to go with!